पु ल देशपांडे.

बरेच दिवस लिहायला जमला नाही. नुकताच एक मित्राच्या ब्लॉग वर पुलंचा एक इंग्रजी पत्र सापडल, ते जसा च्या तसा :)


चाळीसएक वर्षांपूर्वी पु.ल. देशपांडे मुंबईत वरळीला राहात होते. त्याच परिसरात असलेल्या आदर्शनगर वसाहतीत वेगवेगळी मातृभाषा असणारी मुलं तिथल्या मैदानावर खेळताना आपापसात ज्या `इंग्लिश' (खरं तर त्या भाषेला `मिंग्लिश'च म्हणावं लागेल!) भाषेत बोलत, त्याच भाषेत पु.ल. देशपांडे यांनी त्याच कॉलनीत राहणारी श्रीमती सुनीताबाई यांची भाची मीरा ठाकूर- आत्ताची डॉ. मीरा नगरकर- हिला ती शालान्त परीक्षा उत्तीर्ण झाल्यावर पाठविलेलं हे पत्र! प्रथमच घेतलेल्या टाइपरायटरवर `बिब्लिकल मेथड' नं- म्हणजे `सर्च ऍंड दाऊ शॅल फाईंड- शोधा म्हणजे सापडेल' अशा पध्द्तीनं अक्षरपट्टीवरील मूळाक्षरं शोधत शोधत स्वत:च एका बोटानं टाईप केलेलं हे पत्र... पु.ल. देशपांडे यांच्या आजवरच्या प्रकाशित वाड:मयात नसलेलं!


1, Roopali,
777, Shivajinagar, Pune-4
22/6/1977

Dearest Mira,
Got Your Letter to your dear Mai-atte in Marathi and in English to me. What lovely English you write man! I and your dear Mai-atte simply `chat ho gaya yaar!' Well, i shall also make `thoda thoda' attempt to write in my desi English- like desi ghee you know. In the fust place our haartiest congrats to you on your getting 79% marks in the S.S.C Exam. The highest number of marks this your Bhai-kaka ever got in his `Zindagi' was 60% in `drill'. How you know? i tell you how. Our Ponga Pandit Dreel Mashter (May his soul rest in peace!) said, `Right turn' and i righted my turn. So 25 marks. He said `left turn' and i lefted my turn. 25 marks. So here it became 50% Then he says `lef righ, lef and righ; like that fastam fast. i fastly and fastly do lef and righ. lef and righ. 10 marks more. 60% O.K.? Then he shouted `Staaaaand at ease' and I standed and `eased'. (If you do'nt know ask your Shivaji-Park Bhaikaka what is the meaning of ease. But don't ask him to ease." When i eased befor that Ponga Pandit Dreel Mashter he Shouted `you fool get out'. I getted out. a little wetted of course with in all 60%. But Your Mai Atte was a `bada scholar you know what. She get 198 out 200 in Maths. Really. Not bundle. And not in Dreel but in Maths. in S.S.C All you Thakur-lok Mathswala you see. Dadarwala Bhaikaka get 90% Mohan kaka 91%, your father 92% Chandukaka lost his 93% by only 60% but now he is the hightest because always in the airplane. What good joke no? Dinesh, Umesh, Sumitra, Shubha, Satish also. Of course sometime examtaker giving marks sleeping sleeping also. How much % you get in maths? Our time sala exam'ner never sleeping yaar. Always wake an exam and give small small marks. But once i made 90% marks in Math in fust standard Marathi Munisipaltywalla School, Gamdevi Bombay-6. Tell you how. Really i was getting 9%. I did some more Maths on my result card and draw one small circle before 9 and make 9% into 90%. Grandfather says - my grandfather not the teacher's grandfather - `Arey shubash - you get 90% marks in Maths, good good good. But you get 90 marks in Maths and total marks in all subject is how 89 only? How's that?' He shouted how's that so bigly that like cricket humpire I say `Out' and lift my hand with by mistake and little finger up. I was you know the bestest fass bowler in Marathi fuss Standard but was soon made Humpire by public demand. Then my Grandfather take Card to my that teacher (May his soul simply rust in peace.) Then dialogue. My Grandfather: Mr. Purshottam's Grandfather: Do total - do total. This boy (I was a boy that time)- gets 90 marks in Maths; and there is histry, there is Marathi there is jogrupy etc. etc. and you total 89? What are you doing in the school Mr. Teacher? Teaching or shaving?' Teacher Both. (G.F. Red with more more angriness.) But the teacher was right. He actually was doing both. Teaching and shaving. Part time in school and more part time in Saloon, opp. School. Then teacher looks at the Card. Starts laughing and laughing and laughing like villain in Hindi film when he pakdaos the she - hero only one in the room with her father gone to Darjiling to eat cold weather. jus like that yaar the teacher laughs. G.F. saying: What happened for laughing? Who is dancing here naked before you?' Hearing my G.F. say naked in the open class everybody laughs. Teacher shouted `Shut up' and the class shutted up. Then teacher to my G.F. Look here Mr. Purushottam's Gra fa, this is his original mark-shit. He turn 9% in 90%. Chor-ka baccha. If Purshya gets why 90 even 19 out of 100 I shall put Satyanarayana to the whole Bombay from Kulaba to Virar and give dinners to all on both the sides of the railway line. How's that?' This time i did not say out but actually ran out and never went to that school again. And here you actually make 79% and Sumitra 80% in S.S.C. yaa Allah Great. You must thank your mother and father for not teaching you and spending their time to teach other people's children and other people spending their money asking your F and M to teach them, that is not your F teaching your M or your M teaching your F, but their other people's children.

So now you go to college kya? Good good. We were happy to know that all your uncles and aunties giving you cash and kind prizes. I tell your Mai-atte to give you prizes but she says Mitra has written that you know why? Because she does not need any more prizes . What Your Mai-atte 98% 420. 2% good for Dinesh only, who pleases her by taking bath every day when in Poona and once in 15 days in Bombay. But do'nt worry your this Bhaikaka loves you so much that you tell what you want I give you. Promise. Like you i also get a letter from Sailor Sunil from Vancouver. in vancouver it seems every sailor hasto write letters. may be Post Office is free. He Writes in English to Practise his English on us. Thank God. But if he learns boxing or karate who will he practice it on? Think.

How is Girish? Our love to him. umesh as you know has joined the indian Air Force. When Sardarji join Air Force it is Hair Force and when Umesh joines Air Force it is Air Farce Do'nt, tell him this joke because when he becomes squander-leader or something like air-filled marshall he may throw a bomb on Roopali and break our earthen Kundi limbu tree. So congrats again and wish you many more 79% to 99% not like me but real, till one day some Prince-charming will pick you up as the 100% best wife for himself like i picked up your Mai-Atte.
Yours very very very Affectionately.

8 Tips to Take Control of Your Weight

Anyone who is overweight will testify that losing weight is not as easy as it seems. The people that are lean, or have gone from fat to skinny will say it’s just a matter of motivation and elbow grease. Although it is not as simple as that. Our environments have waged war on us. Their weapons are sedentary lives and trans fats of mass destruction. All is not lost though, here are some quick simple tips to get ahead!

1. Substitute Water. Our bodies are about 65-70% water. It follows that water would be not only essential, but the best possibly choice of liquids to ingest. In fact, our bodies will sometimes simulate a hunger response, when in reality the body is craving hydration. When hungry, drink a glass or two of water to check if it suppresses your hunger.
2. Chew Your Food. Chewing our food very slowly and deliberately has several benefits that are often overlooked. It gives us the ability to relax, and enjoy our meal. Slow chewing is the first, and highly important, step in a complex system of digestion. Besides, if we eat slowly, we might feel full before finishing the whole meal, and can leave the rest for the next meal.
3. Exercise daily. How silly of me to include something as obvious as exercise. I did a 30 day trial with waking up, and walking for 30 minutes first thing in the morning. My journal records that I was feeling amazing during the period of time that I was following this habit.
4. Publicize your intentions. Start a blog, join a forum, and have other people keep you accountable to help. Tell other people your plan, it would help you get the motivation to go with it!
5. Create a food schedule. Plan your day so that you’re eating at approximately the same time each day. This scheduling will incorporate itself into your circadian rhythm, and aid in digestion.
6. Do not over eat. Know your limit and stop eating when you are full. I have often been a victim of wanting to finish a meal so that it doesn’t go to waste. This has left me with many a stomach ache. Next time, doggy bag it for later, and don’t hurt yourself!
7. Choose your snacks wisely. Put down the Lays and cheese puffs. Pick up the apple and baby carrots. Make the right decision, I know you can do it.
8. Lifestyle. Remember, it’s not about special diets, or special exercise programs. The real secret is in turning your health into a lifestyle, and focusing on this healthy lifestyle with every choice you make.

FAQ about AIDS

Q1) What is HIV?

--> HIV is a virus that attacks the body's immune system - the body's defence against diseases.

Q2) Are HIV and AIDS the same?

--> No. When someone is described as living with HIV, they have the HIV virus in their body. A person is considered to have developed AIDS when the immune system is so weak it can no longer fight off a range of diseases with which it would normally cope.

Q3) How is HIV passed on?

--> HIV can be passed on through infected blood, semen, vaginal fluids or breast milk.

The most common ways HIV is passed on are:

* Sex without a condom with someone living with HIV
* Sharing infected needles, syringes or other injecting drug equipment
* From an HIV-positive mother (to her child) during pregnancy, childbirth or breastfeeding (but with effective treatment and care the risk of transmission can be greatly reduced)

Q4) I don't know anyone with HIV... do I?

--> Today there are more people than ever before living with HIV in the UK, but less people report knowing someone with HIV. People with HIV generally look healthy and many do not find it easy to tell other people, so you may not realise if someone you know if HIV positive. To learn more about the different groups of people affected by HIV view the statistics.


Q5) Is there a cure for HIV?

--> No, but treatment can keep the virus under control and the immune system healthy. People on HIV treatment can live a healthy, active life, although they may experience side effects from the treatment. If HIV is diagnosed late, treatment may be less effective.

Q6) How can I protect myself and others from HIV infection?

--> Always use a condom when having vaginal or anal sex. You also may want to use a condom or dental dam during oral sex although the risk of transmission of HIV is much lower. You can get free condoms from a sexual health clinic, which you can locate at via the fpa website. Never share needles, syringes or any other injecting equipment.

1st December, Something about HIV/AIDS

It is important for everyone to get the facts, talk about HIV/AIDS with partners and loved ones, reduce risk behaviors, and get tested to learn their HIV status.

It's not always easy, but we all must be willing to talk about sex. To protect yourself, you need to understand how a person gets HIV or passes it to someone else. HIV can be passed on when blood, semen (cum), pre-seminal fluid (pre-cum), vaginal fluid, or breast milk from a person who has HIV enters the body of a person who does not have HIV.

The most common ways that HIV is transmitted from one person to another.

• By having sex (anal, vaginal, or oral) with a person who has HIV infection;
• By sharing needles, syringes, or other injection equipment with a person who injects drugs and has HIV; or
• From women with HIV to their babies before or during birth, or through breast-feeding after birth.

Three critical ways of reducing your risk of getting HIV.

• Don't have sex at all (anal, vaginal, and oral sex).
• Only have sex (anal, vaginal, or oral) if you are in a mutually monogamous relationship and you have both tested negative for HIV.
• Use a condom every time you have anal, vaginal, or oral sex.

Other ways you can protect yourself from getting HIV and other STDs.

• Reduce your number of sex partners; this will reduce your risk of getting HIV as well as other STDs.
• Have ongoing and open discussions with your partners about their sexual histories, drug use, and HIV testing behaviors; honesty plays a key role in respectful, mature sexual relationships.
• Encourage all sexual partners to get tested for HIV and make sure they tell you the results.
• Get tested for STDs that could put you at greater risk for becoming infected with HIV.
• If you have an STD, get treatment.
• If you are a man who has sex with other men or if you engage in anal sex, get vaccinated against hepatitis A and B viruses.
• Tell others about the severity of the HIV epidemic in the United States—encourage them to get the facts, protect themselves and those they love, and get tested.

Tips for talking about sex and HIV with your partner.

• Set up a mutually convenient time to talk to your partner.
• Make sure you are in a relaxed environment so your partner doesn't feel pressured or "cornered."
• Talk about your concerns from a personal perspective. In other words, use "I" statements instead of "you" statements which might sound accusatory or blaming.

If you need help gaining the skills to protect yourself from HIV or if you would like to know what other people just like you are doing to protect themselves, you may want to contact a local HIV Prevention organization. Search the CDC National Prevention Information Network organization database.

Secrets For a Flat Stomach

Developing a lean, flat stomach takes time and patience, especially when it comes to those last few kilograms in those hard to lose places. There is only one way to lose fat in the so-called ’stubborn areas,’ and that is with the correct combination strength training (with a extra focus on mid-section), cardiovascular exercise (short, hard workouts), and stable blood sugar (keeps you from adding additional fat and makes it easier for the body to use body fat for fuel).

Spot Reduction is a Myth - The first thing you need to realize is that it is impossible to ’spot reduce’ fat from one specific part of the body. Fat loss occurs systemically, meaning that you can’t control where the fat comes from. When you burn fat for energy, you will draw it from all areas of the body, and the first place you tend to put it on will be the last place it comes off.

Cardio, cardio, cardio - Doing all the abs exercises in the world will do nothing if you have a layer of fat covering it. Doing strength training, or lifting weights, would help, but not as much as aerobic exercise. If you want to add some ab exercises in after the cardio, that’s great, but be sure to work your whole torso, not just the upper abs — that includes the lower abs, lower back and the muscles that wrap around your sides.

For example, Walking, jogging, bicycling, elliptical exercise and stair climbing are all great fat burners. Most give up early in the workout. During the first 10 minutes of aerobic activity, glycogen (stored carbohydrates) is the primary fuel source. Because you don’t burn significant amounts of fat until glycogen stores are depleted, the key to maximum fat loss is to work out aerobically for 30-60 minutes continuously per session.

Diet – Its best to stay away from fried food and too many sugary desserts. Abdominal fat loss is a 50% exercise, 50% nutrition combination. Regardless of how much you workout, if the number of calories you take in is greater than the amount you burn, you’ll still put on abdominal fat.

Eat Small Meals Regularly - You should try and spread your calories out into five small meals a day instead of 2 or 3 big ones so that you don’t overeat in one feeding.

Give it Time – If you want to have a flat stomach in 3 weeks, forget it. Losing fat takes time, and it’s unhealthy to lose too much weight too fast. Gradual weight loss is healthier, and more likely to be sustained over time. Go for a lifestyle change, something you can live with for the rest of your life, or you will just yo-yo. It’s a marathon, not a sprint.

Feel free to share your tips and stories in the comments !!! :-)